Architect: Of course they’re safe. There’s absolutely no doubt about that. They are as strong, solid and as safe as any other building method in this country provided of course people believe in them.
Monty Python The Nude Man 1972
Sheldon Cooper: Now, this may look like a Tic Tac, but it is really a powerful medication specifically designed to cure your illness as well as freshen your breath.
The Big Bang Theory The Fish Guts Displacement 2012
As panic continues to overtake Democrats running in 2014 and the Obama Administration redefines words in order to create a semblance of legality to their delaying the effects of the Affordable Care Act a small sign of hope has appeared on the horizon.
A new study published online in the journal Cancer suggests that any relief acupuncture brings may be the result of a placebo effect.Twenty-three of the women received eight weeks of acupuncture; the rest received eight weeks of something called “sham acupuncture,” where needles are placed on the skin somewhat randomly — not at traditional acupuncture points — and then not actually inserted.
The result? All of the patients reported that their side effects had improved, especially the severity of their hot flashes.
That the equation it’s all about belief!
Rather than actually worry about providing treatment to people what if the Obama administration uses their persuasive powers to magnify the placebo effect among the low information voters who are their base?
Picture…a massive network of “Placebo” clinics staffed by out of work actors, gender studies Majors , professional protesters, out of work union members and liberal arts majors who can’t find work in the actual Obama economy.
Visualize:…these Obama acolytes trained to project sincerity and assurance, taught to convince low information voters they know medicine by the finest army of the A list actors that ever supported a Democrat Administration.
Envision: a vast array of fake medical devices (much like the empty shells in furniture stores to simulate Blu-Ray players) convincing patients that they are actually being monitored by the most advanced technology available.
Imagine… buildings now empty where the Obama Economy has wreaked havoc turned into Obamacare placebo clinics all across the nation, serving those not covered .
Viola! Suddenly you have an army of Pseudo Doctors operate pseudo clinics for those who can’t afford insurance or can’t see a doctor due to the wait times that Obamacare produces. Health care for all!
It’s the Monty Python El Mystico medical solution, and as per the famous Python skit the cost savings will be phenomenal!
Narriator: The local Council here have over fifty hypnosis-induced twenty-five story blocks, put up by El Mystico and Janet. I asked Mr Ken Verybigliar the advantages of hypnosis compared to other building methods.
Mr Ken Verybigliar: Well there is a considerable financial advantage in using the services of El Mystico. A block, like Mystico Point here, would normally cost in the region of one-and-a-half million pounds. This was put up for five pounds and thirty bob for Janet.
Remember what matters here is not if people get actual treatment, what matters is that they believe they are getting treatment and act accordingly.
That highlights the one drawback to the plan,
Voice Over: But the obvious question is are they safe?
Mr. Clement Onan: Of course they’re safe. There’s absolutely no doubt about that. They are as strong, solid and as safe as any other building method in this country provided of course people believe in them.
and the risk involved in disbelief,
Interviewer: You don’t mind living in a figment of another man’s imagination?
Tenant: No, it’s much better than where we used to live.
Interviewer: Where did you used to live?
Tenant: We had an eighteen-roomed villa overlooking Nice.
Voice Over: Really, that sounds much better.
Tenant: Oh yeah, you’re right. (The building starts to shake & collapse) No, no, no, of course not! (The Building stops shaking & rights itself) Phew, that was close.
that risk however is small because the Administration has two huge advantages that the counsel in the Monty Python sketch didn’t:
1. A public so gullible that it was willing to re-elect President Obama despite one of the least successful terms in presidential history including the worst economy in living memory of anyone under 80.
2. A media that is so totally in the tank for them that they would do anything ANYTHING to save the Democrats & liberalism and the first Black president from himself.
The MSM would sell this as the most creative use of holistic medicine ever invented. University experts will cheer the departure from the oppressive western cultural standard of physically treating the ill and herald it as a great equalizer among the classes where anyone even with no skill at medicine or actual knowledge of biology can be a doctor. And anyone who questions this will be considered a “denier” as repugnant as one who doubts global warming.
The potential is unlimited, the Pseudo Doctors who produce the most confidence in patients can be made specialists, and used for more advanced issues to increase the placebo effect giving people the confidence to fight through pain and work through disease that would normally disable them completely.
As for Sarah Palin and the Death Panel problem, no worries! The best of the best can be part of the Syzygy Darklock brigade assigned to patients who are too expensive to treat & or have no hope. The worst case scenario these Obamacare masters can convince the families that all that can be done for their loved ones has been done so there is no backlash at their deaths.
And maybe just maybe the very best of them might be able, as Darklock managed to convince them they are not in fact dead and allowing them to live normal fulfilling lives. They can even be given job placement, if they get employment as online game testers they might continue for years with everyone assuming the stench of their decaying corpses is simply normal bad gamer hygiene!
Exit question: Can anyone honestly say this administration wouldn’t give this a shot if they thought for one second they could get away with it?
It’s Sunday the 5th day of Christmas, the start of a new week and soon the beginning of a new year. It’s also the start of a new $340 payweek to cover the mortgage & the Magnificent Seven.
Unfortunately no matter how hard I try the bank is not likely to accept any kind of pseudo or placebo payment so I will still need 17 Tip jar hitters kicking in $20 this week to make sure all the bills are paid on time.
Help me end the old year and start the new one on track, please hit DaTipJar below.
Let me remind all that the need to shake DaTipJar each week will disappear as soon as we have enough subscribers to carry the site without the weekly goal.
Right now we are We remain 58 1/4 new subscribers at $20 a month to do this
It’s still the 5th day of Christmas so give yourself a Christmas present that will inform and entertain you 365 days a year in 2014. Subscribe below.