Readability

People of the Lie

by baldilocks

Orig­i­nally posted on Novem­ber 9, 2003 at my old blogbaldilocks

You know them, as do I. They are the peo­ple who have become so used to lying to get what they want, that they actu­ally believe their own lies and think you’re the one that’s crazy for not believ­ing them also. I know a few peo­ple like this. I was even mar­ried to one.

There are some peo­ple who put the cart in front of the horse; the con­clu­sion is made first, then the premises are twisted to fit that conclusion.

Self-​serving ideas are formed — to jus­tify what they want – and these ideas become “fact” to them. Then, when those who have the horse-​cart thing in the cor­rect order try to show them that their cart is miss­ing a wheel, has a hole in the bot­tom, or is made of rot­ting wood, they shut their ears and say “la-​la-​la-​la-​la.”

Or maybe a sit­u­a­tion occurs; maybe an argu­ment in which both you and that per­son participated.

When the per­son recounts the story, how­ever, the per­ti­nent facts are miss­ing. Or, even if the facts do appear in the recount, they are so twisted that you don’t even rec­og­nize that it’s the same event. They are twisted, of course, in that person’s favor and to make you look like the bad guy.

Though you were there too, you find your­self won­der­ing if maybe it was you who for­got what really hap­pened. But only for a moment. Then you real­ize who or, rather, what you are deal­ing with.

You point out the “for­got­ten” facts to the per­son. Even if they still have a sliver of hon­esty left in them to acknowl­edge that they got the telling of the facts wrong, they will still make every­thing your fault.

I did this because I know that you would have done the same thing!” This is said with­out giv­ing an exam­ple of when you did the same thing.

I did this because you did this.” The “this” will turn out to be some­thing totally innocu­ous or even some­thing that the two of you had agreed upon at the time. You throw up your hands.

They want what­ever it is they want, the truth be damned. Their wants over­ride any notions of honor, fidelity and morality.

You know what these peo­ple are called. Sociopaths.

I will admit to exhibit­ing some socio­pathic behav­ior in my younger days. But, at some point, I real­ized that I was hurt­ing peo­ple. At some point, I grew up; per­haps after bear­ing the brunt of oth­ers’ sociopa­thy. And it is a mat­ter of grow­ing up. After all, what are lit­tle babies but cute lit­tle bundled-​up squalling psychopaths?

Beware of these peo­ple, these babies that have grown taller, but have never grown up. Some will merely become a blip in your rear-​view mir­ror — if you’re for­tu­nate. It’s the ones that won’t go away, the ones that have the power to affect change for the worst on a grand scale that are the prob­lem. You have to keep an eye, or per­haps some­thing more lethal, on these.

Juli­ette Akinyi Ochieng blogs at baldilocks. Her first novel, Tale of the Tigers: Love is Not a Game, was pub­lished in 2009; the sec­ond edi­tion in 2012. Her new novel, Arlen’s Harem, is due in 2014. Help her fund it and help keep her blog alive!

_​_​_​_​_​_​_​_​_​_​_​_​_​_​_​_​_​_​_​_​_​_​_​_​

If you become one of the 55 34 sub­scribers @ at $20 a month are nec­es­sary to secure the cost of DaM­ag­nif­i­cent Seven & my monthly mort­gage on a per­ma­nent basis but do so at the $25 level you can receive one of sev­eral Exclu­sive Orig­i­nal Chris Muir high Res Graph­ics of the orig­i­nal mem­bers of DaTechGuy’s Mag­nif­i­cent Seven Gang. like the one on the right.Baldilocks mini

Please spec­ify which of the eight hi res (includ­ing myself you wish to receive) Sub­scribe at $50 a month and receive all eight. Sub­scribe at $100 a month and get all 8 wanted posters high res graph­ics plug the high res ver­sion of all of us exclu­sively cre­ated for sub­scribers of DaT­e­chGuy blog by Chris Muir himself!

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by baldilocks

Originally posted on November 9, 2003 at my old blogbaldilocks

You know them, as do I. They are the people who have become so used to lying to get what they want, that they actually believe their own lies and think you’re the one that’s crazy for not believing them also. I know a few people like this. I was even married to one.

There are some people who put the cart in front of the horse; the conclusion is made first, then the premises are twisted to fit that conclusion.

Self-serving ideas are formed—to justify what they want–and these ideas become “fact” to them. Then, when those who have the horse-cart thing in the correct order try to show them that their cart is missing a wheel, has a hole in the bottom, or is made of rotting wood, they shut their ears and say “la-la-la-la-la.”

Or maybe a situation occurs; maybe an argument in which both you and that person participated.

When the person recounts the story, however, the pertinent facts are missing. Or, even if the facts do appear in the recount, they are so twisted that you don’t even recognize that it’s the same event. They are twisted, of course, in that person’s favor and to make you look like the bad guy.

Though you were there too, you find yourself wondering if maybe it was you who forgot what really happened. But only for a moment. Then you realize who or, rather, what you are dealing with.

You point out the “forgotten” facts to the person. Even if they still have a sliver of honesty left in them to acknowledge that they got the telling of the facts wrong, they will still make everything your fault.

“I did this because I know that you would have done the same thing!” This is said without giving an example of when you did the same thing.

“I did this because you did this.” The “this” will turn out to be something totally innocuous or even something that the two of you had agreed upon at the time. You throw up your hands.

They want whatever it is they want, the truth be damned. Their wants override any notions of honor, fidelity and morality.

You know what these people are called. Sociopaths.

I will admit to exhibiting some sociopathic behavior in my younger days. But, at some point, I realized that I was hurting people. At some point, I grew up; perhaps after bearing the brunt of others’ sociopathy. And it is a matter of growing up. After all, what are little babies but cute little bundled-up squalling psychopaths?

Beware of these people, these babies that have grown taller, but have never grown up. Some will merely become a blip in your rear-view mirror—if you’re fortunate. It’s the ones that won’t go away, the ones that have the power to affect change for the worst on a grand scale that are the problem. You have to keep an eye, or perhaps something more lethal, on these.

Juliette Akinyi Ochieng blogs at baldilocks. Her first novel, Tale of the Tigers: Love is Not a Game, was published in 2009; the second edition in 2012. Her new novel, Arlen’s Harem, is due in 2014. Help her fund it and help keep her blog alive!

________________________

If you become one of the 55 3/4 subscribers @ at $20 a month are necessary to secure the cost of DaMagnificent Seven & my monthly mortgage on a permanent basis but do so at the $25 level you can receive one of several Exclusive Original Chris Muir high Res Graphics of the original members of DaTechGuy’s Magnificent Seven Gang. like the one on the right.Baldilocks mini

Please specify which of the eight hi res (including myself you wish to receive) Subscribe at $50 a month and receive all eight. Subscribe at $100 a month and get all 8 wanted posters high res graphics plug the high res version of all of us exclusively created for subscribers of DaTechGuy blog by Chris Muir himself!

monthly Grand Fedora : $100.00USD – monthlyBeanie : $2.00USD – weeklyCap : $10.00USD – monthlyHat : $20.00USD – monthlyFedora : $25.00USD –