30 Tips to stay Married 30 years Today’s Tip: Maintain Surprise

by Datechguy | April 3rd, 2018

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30 Tips to stay Married 30 years Today's Tip: Maintain Surprise

King: Take it away, every­day the same thing. Vari­ety! I want some­thing dif­fer­ent. Fix me Hasenpf­ef­fer right away!

Shishk­abugs (Bugs Bunny short car­toon) 1962

One of the things that is often men­tioned as a prob­lem in rela­tion­ships is the same old thing. Our con­sumer soci­ety pushes the dread of the same old thing for the sake of sell­ing and a lot of peo­ple find them­selves spend­ing a lot of money on junk because of it.

The same dread is often pushed in rela­tion­ships today in movies and TV. The dread of the same old thing has been advanced to the point where peo­ple are mak­ing choices that are toxic for the long term health of a marriage.

The best way to avoid this prob­lem? Main­tain healthy sur­prise in a rela­tion­ship. Here are a few ways of doing this that doesn’t involve risks that include catch­ing the social dis­ease of the day.

On a ran­dom day each month get your spouse a small gift. This doesn’t have to be any­thing big, a sin­gle flower, a six pack of beer, a lit­tle thing. If you reg­u­larly get a cof­fee, skip it one day and get some­thing for daspouse. pick a day and that day use those few dol­lars to a lit­tle some­thing for daw­ife or Dahusband.

And once every three months instead of the small thing do some­thing slightly big­ger, a small lunch, a movie.

And once a year instead of the small thing, do some­thing big­ger, a show, a fancier din­ner, an overnight

This should be inde­pen­dent of reg­u­lar birth­days and anniver­saries and it should also be some­thing that doesn’t break the bank. The real trick is to keep it ran­dom (I sug­gest using old D & D dice that you’ve put away years ago.

Again it isn’t the size of said gift, it’s the fact that it is com­pletely unex­pected that makes it special.

Now I’m sure many of you can come up with bet­ter ideas and schemes and nat­u­rally you will know your spouse bet­ter than me but as long as it’s a bit ran­dom and a bit of a sur­prise you will put an extra smile on your mate’s face and those extra smiles will add up to many years of happiness.

My 30 Tips so far

Tip 1: Choose Wisely
Tip 2: A long Engage­ment
Tip 3: Get Mar­ried in Church
Tip 4: Don’t write your own vows.
Tip 5: Set lim­its early
Tip 6: Live Mod­estly
Tip 7: Embrace Your Mother-​In-​Law
Tip 8: If pos­si­ble take advan­tage of your parent’s advice.
Tip 9: Don’t Diss your spouse to your friends
Tip 10: Remem­ber Birthday’s and Anniver­saries
Tip 11: NEVER VENT ON SOCIAL MEDIA!
Tip 12: 30 Tips to stay Mar­ried 30 years Today’s Tip: Pray
Tip 13: Angry Gifts
Tip 14: Don’t sweat the Small stuff
Tip 15: Care­fully Choose the Hills Worth Dying On
Tip 16: Avoid Temp­ta­tion and Sus­pi­cion
Tip 17: Have an Argu­ment Escape Plan (and or let your spouse use their’s)
Tip 18: Don’t spoil the kids, par­tic­u­larly early.
Tip 19: A United Front
Tip 20: Remem­ber Mar­riage is work.

King: Take it away, everyday the same thing. Variety! I want something different. Fix me Hasenpfeffer right away!

Shishkabugs (Bugs Bunny short cartoon) 1962

One of the things that is often mentioned as a problem in relationships is the same old thing. Our consumer society pushes the dread of the same old thing for the sake of selling and a lot of people find themselves spending a lot of money on junk because of it.

The same dread is often pushed in relationships today in movies and TV. The dread of the same old thing has been advanced to the point where people are making choices that are toxic for the long term health of a marriage.

The best way to avoid this problem? Maintain healthy surprise in a relationship. Here are a few ways of doing this that doesn’t involve risks that include catching the social disease of the day.

On a random day each month get your spouse a small gift.  This doesn’t have to be anything big, a single flower, a six pack of beer, a little thing.  If you regularly get a coffee, skip it one day and get something for daspouse.  pick a day and that day use those few dollars to a little something for dawife or Dahusband.

And once every three months instead of the small thing do something slightly bigger, a small lunch, a movie.

And once a year instead of the small thing, do something bigger, a show, a fancier dinner, an overnight

This should be independent of regular birthdays and anniversaries and it should also be something that doesn’t break the bank.  The real trick is to keep it random (I suggest using old D & D dice that you’ve put away years ago.

Again it isn’t the size of said gift, it’s the fact that it is completely unexpected that makes it special.

Now I’m sure many of you can come up with better ideas and schemes and naturally you will know your spouse better than me but as long as it’s a bit random and a bit of a surprise you will put an extra smile on your mate’s face and those extra smiles will add up to many years of happiness.

My 30 Tips so far

Tip 1:  Choose Wisely
Tip 2: A long Engagement
Tip 3: Get Married in Church
Tip 4: Don’t write your own vows.
Tip 5: Set limits early
Tip 6: Live Modestly
Tip 7: Embrace Your Mother-In-Law
Tip 8: If possible take advantage of your parent’s advice. 
Tip 9: Don’t Diss your spouse to your friends
Tip 10: Remember Birthday’s and Anniversaries
Tip 11: NEVER VENT ON SOCIAL MEDIA!
Tip 12: 30 Tips to stay Married 30 years Today’s Tip: Pray
Tip 13: Angry Gifts
Tip 14: Don’t sweat the Small stuff
Tip 15: Carefully Choose the Hills Worth Dying On
Tip 16: Avoid Temptation and Suspicion
Tip 17: Have an Argument Escape Plan (and or let your spouse use their’s)
Tip 18: Don’t spoil the kids, particularly early.
Tip 19: A United Front
Tip 20: Remember Marriage is work.

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