by baldilocks

Usually, I forego linking to the Washington Times; not for an ideological reason, but a practical one. The site is a nightmare of pop-up ads.

But for this story, I couldn’t resist.

The [U.S.] Navy has rejected the application of one Jason Heap, a doctor of theological history, he having obtained such a degree at Oxford University in Great Britain. (…)

Mr. Heap sued, first in 2014 and again this year, to require the Navy to appoint him to the chaplaincy corps, and, to his point, to recognize him as a “secular humanist,” presumably on his dogtag, thereby recognizing secular humanism, or atheism, as a legitimate “faith.” (…)

The Navy was about ready to make the appointment after the Chaplain Appointment and Retention Eligibility Advisory Group recommended it to the chief of naval operations, who has final say over who gets to be a chaplain and who doesn’t. After 67 members of Congress, 22 senators and 45 congressmen from both parties urged the Navy not to make the appointment, the Navy agreed.

“Without a belief in the transcendent, and with avowed opposition to religion itself,” the lawmakers wrote, “an individual cannot fulfill the mission and duties of a chaplain.”

Ooh look! Congress does something logical for a change! That right there is one of God’s miracles. But I predict that it won’t be long before the definition of military chaplain receives a postmodern facelift, also known as the Coconut Treatment.

Question: What do you call a chaplain who doesn’t believe in God?

Answer: A psychologist.

Question: Why would Dr. Heap want to be appointed as a Navy chaplain?

Answer: In order to infiltrate the program. It isn’t as if this hasn’t happened before.

(Thanks to Stacey E. Washington)

Juliette Akinyi Ochieng has been blogging since 2003 as baldilocks. Her older blog is here.  She published her first novel, Tale of the Tigers: Love is Not a Game in 2012.

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