Mandy: You sound Scottish.
Amy: I am Scottish. What’s wrong with that? Scotland’s gotta be here somewhere.
Mandy: No. They wanted their own ship.
Amy: Good for them. Nothing changes.

Doctor Who: The Beast Below 2010

Once upon a time there was a political party in Massachusetts called the GOP that regularly lost elections for National office and that party had a choice to make.

For the 2nd time in four years they had a chance to face a Democrat after a tough primary race alone on a ballot without city counselors, town clerks,  governors counselors, ballots questions ,  state reps or senators that might have voters who supported them to help increase the Democrat party vote.

The last time this happened everyone, including the party expected to lose.  But the Tea Party base was energized, they volunteered in large numbers and they helped draw volunteers and funds from members of the GOP base nationwide.  Their candidate, with nothing to lose,  embraced that base and highlighted a single key issue that polled well among both the party and independents who made up the majority of the electorate in the campaign.

With the money and manpower the teaparty base drew the polling improved and the state party and national party decided to help after all.

Not only did their candidate win but that fall the Party they had the best showing in state elections for rep they had in years.

But the GOP decided they didn’t like the Tea Party people or the base because they said they wanted a louder voice in the party and the candidate decided the people voted for him because they loved him so much and not because the Tea Party and base worked so hard, so they pushed them away in the next election.

They not only lost the national seat they had won, but lost some of their new state rep seats too.

But even though the GOP didn’t like them the tea party, the base didn’t go away because they wanted their state to be better for themselves and their children so when there was another chance to win a seat in the same way they did in 2010 they found a candidate they agreed with and supported them in straw polls all over the state.and said to the party:  “Please vote for our man and our people will come back and help beat the Democrats again.”

But the establishment decided didn’t want to support the tea party or the base’s man who agreed with them and wanted someone else.  So they thought and thought and came up with an idea.

You see the very smart people in the establishment of the national party noticed a lot of people had come to America and Massachusetts from a distant southern land called “Hispanica” and while culturally they seemed a lot like the base, they voted for the Democrats.  They decided this was because the law said the people from “Hispanica” who wanted to live in the US had to follow the same rules as people from England, Congo or even India, but they didn’t want to.  So the party decided if they made a new rule that allowed anybody who broke the law coming to America to stay all the people who came from “Hispanica” and their children who already were here would decide they would not hate the GOP any more and maybe vote for them.

So they found a candidate who not only supported that new rule but whose mom & dad came from “Hispanica” so he spoke the  language of “Hispanica” so that all the people whose families came from that southern land would see him and say:

“Look this man is the very first from our home of “Hispanica” to run for senate so we will support him even though the Democrats have told us for years that the people in that party were bad and hated all people from “Hispanica” and wanted to take away the money the government gives to some people who come from there.”

So the party backed him even though the base and tea party didn’t agree with him saying they might stay home, and the national donor base didn’t give him money to hire people to help him win either because he supported laws they hated.

The party establishment didn’t worry.  They were much smarter than the base or the tea party and knew because their candidate supported the new rules that the national establishment did and was a child of “Hispanica” he would make all the people from “Hispanica” decide to vote for him.

Election day came and even through the Democrats had plenty of money and their machine was ready to roll their candidate only managed to draw 60% of they votes the very bad candidate did in 2010.

So to win the GOP only needed to draw 55% of the voters they did in 2010.  In some towns where the base was larger than others , voters said: “Even though you disagreed with us and the “Establishment” doesn’t like us we think you are better than the other guy” and voted for him.

But even though he won those towns and cities many of the base in those towns stayed home and didn’t come to vote  so he didn’t get a lot of votes extra votes.

But they still weren’t worried because their candidate supported the new rules and was a child of “Hispanica” so he would make all the people from “Hispanica” decide to vote for him.

So on election day they went to a city with many people from “Hispanica” and said: “Look our candidate is a child of Hispanica just like you! Come vote for him!”  But the people of that city said: We’ve never heard of a country called “Hispanica” Our parents come from a country called “The Dominican Republic” and they voted for the party they always did.

Then they went to another town and said “Look our candidate is from the land of Hispanica just like you” and the people of that town said: “We’ve never heard of a land called ‘Hispanica” our fathers came from a land called “Brazil” and they voted for the party they always did.

And everywhere the story was the same, the people never heard of “Hispanica”, they said their fathers had come from places like “Mexico”, “Puerto Rico”, “Peru”, “Ecuador” and all those people voted for the same party they always did.

So when all the votes were counted the GOP got less than 45% of the people who came to vote for the party just three years ago and they lost the best chance they would have to win for a very long time…

…and they blamed the Tea Party and the Base.

The Moral of our tale? There are two:

There is no land of “Hispanica”.  Instead there are 25 Latin American counties with different cultures, peoples and traditions so stop pretending people from those lands will vote for you just because you ran someone named “Gomez”.

You can’t add to your vote total if you chase away the base of voters most likely to support and finance you.

The End.

Update:  One more moral, no matter how good an idea you have for a post, if you finish it at 1:30 AM sleep on it and post it in the morning after you proofread it with a full night’s sleep under your belt.

************************************************

Olimometer 2.52

One upon a time there was a conservative who lost his job in the Tech Industry and started to write and report on politics. He worked very hard and after 5 years built a following and managed to start a radio show but like many new business’ couldn’t afford to draw a pay.

So he asked his many readers if 15 of them a week would be willing to kick in $20 so he could draw enough of a monthly pay to afford his $1210 mortgage

For four months he was able to do so but in the fifth month his draw was not as successful so by Wednesday morning he was still $138 short on a weekly paycheck and $499 short of the mortgage payment.

So he asked if 7 more readers could kick in $20 to make the paycheck to start and then perhaps he could find others willing to cover the $361 defect for the month.

I’m afraid you will have to decide how the story ends.